The Longest Day

Today will be the longest day I have been alone with the kids yet.  Brian left around 8am this morning and won't be home until close to 11pm - long after (hopefully) we have all gone to bed.

I must say that things are going pretty well.  I did get pretty frustrated at 4am and again about 15 minutes ago when Grayson would not settle down and go to sleep.  He spends his mornings pretty much awake and basically fussy, unless I am holding him and patting his bottom.  But on the up side, he sleeps most of the afternoon so Ruth and I get to play together then.  Ruth is doing a great job of helping and entertaining herself in the mornings.  I allow her to watch one TV show in the morning and she is pretty much glued to that show.  She does watch videos of herself on the computer in the afternoon if she is awake when I pump.  I am only pumping three times a day and still am able to get 4 bottles and usually one bag in the freezer.  I hope on Friday to go to two pumping sessions a day.  I am almost over my guilt and saddness of weaning earlier than I had planned.  Going back to work on Thursday helped with that transition for sure. 

This infancy has also been easier because I finally put my pride down and let Brian force me out of the house two days a week.  Our beloved Ms. Leigh Ann comes on Tuesdays at 9 am and leaves at 2:30 when I get back from work.  I teach between 12:30 and 1:45.  So in the morning I plan to either work out or work on grading and lectures.  It is nice to be on campus by 11:30 to get a parking spot and to class early to set up for the lecture.  I have always resisted doing this in the past because of money.  So silly, isn't it, to let money run your life.  But since I don't contribute much and all my salary goes for childcare, I didn't feel I deserved any more time.  Brian said I didn't have a choice and that me having some time alone would make me a better mother and a better wife.  And although I fought him during Ruth's infancy, this time I gave in.  I have to admit, he was right.  I am more calm and a better mom.  He has also said we have to have one date night a month. 

But let me tell you how God blessed us.  Brian got an unexpected raise last week.  The amount:  just enough (after taxes) to pay for childcare for the year.  Isn't that funny?  Here I was resisting this "me time" until my husband forced me to take it and God all along had planned to bless us.  Who knows?  Maybe if I had agreed to this earlier then Brian would have gotten his raise earlier? 

I will try to post video this afternoon if the kids cooperate.  Grayson, right as we speak, is stirring (eventhough I just put him down).